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Lymph, fascia and feeling great!

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Lymphatic drainage is having its moment in the social spaces and honestly, this is a trend I can get behind! If you are a woman, over a certain age, and you dont have a daily lymphatic drainage pratice, you are missing out on a vital piece of physical wellness.

Its not complicated, you dont need fancy tools, and it honestly can be done in the shower (or in the car, stuck in traffic!) so jump on it. The benefits can be as effective as botox when done consistently but more than that better drainage equals better repair and recovery. But why does it matter?

Lets start with the basics;

There are three primary functions of the lymphatic system: first is the maintenance of fluid balance, second is the facilitation of the absorption of dietary fats from the gastrointestinal tract to the bloodstream for metabolism or storage, and third is the enhancement and facilitation of the immune system.

The lymphatic system clears away infection and keeps your body fluids in balance. If it’s not working properly, fluid builds in your tissues and causes swelling, bloating and water retention.

You can support your lymph system through exercise, hydration and massage and start to see and feel the benefits very quickly.

Ok you say, but what does fascia have anything to do with it?

Fascia is intimately connected to the lymphatic system because the lymphatic vessels are located within it, and the lymph system relies on the fascia to pump lymph fluid. Healthy, mobile fascia facilitates lymph flow by acting as a pump, while restrictions in the fascia can slow drainage, leading to waste and toxin buildup.

But here where fascia gets even more interesting….and trust me when I tell you I can nerd out on this topic for hours. I promise to keep it short.

Until recently enough, fascia was believed to be a net-like covering over your muscles and tissues, think like the net your oranges and lemons come in. So we knew that if it was overstretched and tight it was a problem, but that was kind of where it was left. Just an assesory piece. Now though, the research is astounding and the true function and nature of fascia is unwinding for us (pun intended)

Your fascia is a network of neural path ways, sending sensory and physiological information literally at the speed of light. It can determine posture, reflex responses, connects to all organ systems and stores emotional data. It is the data bank for your whole being.

So tension and tightness in the fascia, which creates blockages in the lymph system, tightens muscles and can impact organ systems can be physical or emotional. The issues literally stored in the tissues!

This is such a simplifed explanation, but hopefully you get the picture. Honestly we are so magical.

Because of the interconnected nature of our body systems, don’t you think it makes sense to treat ourselves on a big picture level? I am glad you agree.

Whole body, balanced health is really what I believe in and because of that I am kicking off the back to school fitness rush with a softer kind of challenge. One that creates a better relationship with flow in our bodies. Not because I dont want you to sweat and lift heavy and get the body your 80 year old self will thank you for building…..but because through addressing your lymph and fascia you get easier movement, better recovery and a healthier version of you.

Thats the kind of wellness we all truly deserve.

Want to join us for the 30 day Physical Flow Challenge? Click here to grab the full program 

You wont regret it x

 

 

 

 

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Worried about the effects of a week off……don’t be!

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The summer is supposed to be a time for us to add a little fun, a little rest and reset ahead of the busy back to school season.

So why add guilt and stress over a week off?

I am all for routine, and love to stay active on my own breaks, but trust me, you will not find me in the hotel weights room! Here is 5 reasons why not doing your usual workout on your week off might actually be exactly what your body needs.

 

Why Recovery (Or De-Load) Weeks Are Important

Does the thought of taking a break from workouts make your heart race? All your time and dedication to getting fitter is about to go down the toilet in a week. Stop right there. Before we go any further, we want to be clear that taking a rest week isn’t about losing your gains—it’s about supporting and strengthening them.

While lounging on the couch all week eating takeout might be a quick way to pack on the pounds, a de-load week isn’t about avoiding all activity. It’s about hitting the reset button and giving your body a chance to rest, relax, and rejuvenate; an opportunity to catch up and support and repair.

Heavy lifting might stimulate muscle growth, but if you want to get the most out of your training program, you also need to give your muscles ample rest because the recovery is where the growth happens.

During a de-load week, you want to avoid lifting and cardiovascular exercise completely. The idea here is to reduce stress on the body and provide the proper foundation to support growth—sleep, vitamins, minerals, and low-impact activity.

Our bodies can recover and respond to workouts between training sessions. Still, heavy or intense resistance workouts put a tremendous amount of stress on your body—and it’s not just the musculoskeletal system that’s affected. The entire neuromuscular and immune systems take a hit from weight training. When you gift yourself a break from the intensity, you allow these systems to get back in balance and support optimal functioning.

Additionally, if you lack motivation, stepping away for a week is a great way to pick up that vigor and motivation back up, which leads to greater drive, intensity, and results.

Plus, when you break up your training every 8 to 10 weeks, you can set more manageable goals and reassess after each block for greater improvement.

Three Facts About Taking A Week Off You’ll Want To Know

  1. Levels of testosterone and growth hormone increase during the recovery period
  2. A study published in the Journal of Applied Physiology found that maximal oxygen uptake (VO2 max) declines by 7% after three weeks of inactivity
  3. A few rest days up to a week can have a beneficial effect on enhancing maximal strength

Five Reasons To Take A Week Off Workouts

1. It can address stress levels

Intense training is a form of stress on the body, which can lead to elevated stress hormones—cortisol, epinephrine, and norepinephrine.

Studies show that moderate to high-intensity exercise (60-80% VO2max) causes increases in circulating cortisol levels, likely due to a combination of hemoconcentration and HPA axis stimulus (ACTH). In contrast, low-intensity exercise (40%) does not increase cortisol levels to the same degree.

Chronically high cortisol levels will not only be detrimental to your performance and recovery but can also result in serious hormonal imbalances that can lead to a slew of nasty symptoms. Use a de-load week to catch up on sleep, errands, housework, and anything else you’ve been neglecting, and use it as a time to reset your cortisol and reduce stress.

2. Get more sleep

Does your alarm go off daily at 5 AM for your workout? Take this week to catch some extra shut-eye. Sleep depravation impairs cognitive performance and has significant implications for growth and recovery.

As such, sleep debt impairs the activity of protein synthesis pathways and increases the activity of degradation pathways, leading to loss of muscle mass and hindering recovery. Give yourself this time to get back on track with your sleep schedule and get 7-9 hours per night. And once you get back to training, figure out how to maintain the sleep you need.

3. Avoid burnout

Are your adrenals working overtime, and you’re constantly tired and not seeing the results you want? Too much activity can undermine your efforts.

Going hard and pushing yourself is great, but your body can only sustain so much pressure until it eventually needs a break—and if you don’t give it one, you risk burnout and long-term damage. If you’re not keen on stepping away for weeks because of burnout or injury, stop it before it starts.

4. Boost strength and muscle growth

Want to maximize muscle growth? Take time off training. Most lifters are under the impression that you get strong by lifting weights, but you get stronger by allowing your body to recover from the damage induced by weight lifting. Your body needs that time off of training to rebuild muscle tissue and let training adaptations occur. Don’t be surprised if you return after a week only to feel stronger and better equipped for higher intensities.

You’d be surprised how much more efficient your body is when it’s not constantly trying to recover but actually does recover.

5. Re-motivate

Are your workouts not feeling the same as they were? Do you find yourself struggling to drag yourself into the gym?

A motivation hump happens, and irritability and mood changes are one of the first signs. Giving yourself a week from the gym may not entirely reverse overtraining, but it can help to reset your motivation levels and get you back to the peppy, hyped, I’m ready to kill this workout frame of mind you were previously in.

 

Hopefully you see the benefits and embrace the holiday! And we are always glad to see you back and feeling your best x

 

Self love and goldilocks vibes

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You remember the story about Goldilocks and the three bears right?

Little girl alone in the woods finds a house and proceeds to test all the porridge and all the beds. One is always too hot, one too cold and one is just right. When I was little I thought Goldilocks was a little bit too picky. Plus I was always concerned about where here parents were….and that tells you plenty about my issues!!!

But now I think I finally get it. We arent supposed to settle for something that isnt quite right. It should be just the right fit, especially when it comes to our nourishment, rest and care. That girl had it all figured out.

Ok except for maybe the trespassing into woodland creatures homes!

Which brings me to one of todays top buzz words. SELF LOVE.

We should be able to embrace this term and all that it stands for with nothing but positivity and pure joy. But more often than not I feel a little involuntary eye roll when I say it out loud, and I am willing to bet most of you do too!

I see so many of my friends and clients struggle to go from the decades of self critisisim and doubt and simply fast forward to self love. These things are just a step or two too far apart. Its just not quite right.

So we look to the next best thing, SELF CARE. And still I wonder if this term really hits the mark either. If self love is the slightly too self indulgent princess then self care is her slightly hard worn, hard done by friend who needs some TLC before she hits burnout.

Self care is what we give ourselves when we feel low, worn or broken. Not enough of us are using this as a non-negotiable daily pratice to simpily live our best lives. This one is a little too cold…..

So where to? How do we learn to value our own well being, to show ourselves the kindness and respect that we crave, thrive off and deserve.

Here is a simple question that helps me every time.

Am I worth it?

We all know the answer to this thanks to a worldwide cosmetics company who shall remain nameless 🙂

When I apply this question to my everyday to do’s that may sometimes seem too much, things like making time for my workout, choosing the food options that make me feel great, blocking 30 minutes away from my kids and my business, saying no to a client because I need a day off or even booking the massage that is long overdue, it really puts it in perspective.

You are worth better health. You are worth great nutrition. You are worth a little time to reset and breath. You are worth a day off to get stuff done, or do nothing. SELF WORTH is the step we need.

And once you can start treating your health, your body and your time with the value it deserves it spills over into every aspect of your life.

Allowing yourself to be worthy of the small stuff makes you feel better. And like any small step it leads to bigger, more exciting things. Who knows, maybe we can all embrace self love wholeheartedly without the eye roll soon. For now for at least, self worth fits just right x

For some great exercises on building and exploring your self worth check out The Worthy Project, by Meadow DeVor

Is your goal personal enough?

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We are often reminded that we should have personal goals to aim for, things to keep us motivated (still hate that word) and moving forward towards that thing. It is very true that we do work better when we have something to work towards.

Think about the last time you had a big occasion, or holiday to get in shape for or the last project or presentation you had to really make an impact with. You grinded, grafted, set a structure and plowed through to the end. And hopefully et viola, huge success, goals smashed and you felt unstopable.

But then you stopped.

When there is not a big must do/be/achieve task or event what keeps you going? And this is where you gotta get truly personal.

I am totally guilty of creating huge goals in order to find momentum. Did it for years. I have recently found out that apparently we do not have to constantly change ourselves, or continue to make more, do more and be more. We are actually allowed to just be. Who knew?? *please read this in your most sarcastic tone and possibly throw in a teenage style dramatic eye roll…..

My biggest goal right now is to learn to just be. A this is so deeply personal that some days it hurts. Personally I need to grow, or you could say grow up, and be more measured. This goes against ever fibre of my being because its not shiny and new, exciting or sexy or even very fun. But to grow we have to go to where we are most uncomfortable, and thats where I am.

Now I will still eat well, maintain my workouts and mobility and work hard at my business. These things are all essential for my health and wellbeing and are non-negotiable. But I will be trying very hard to not add more for the sake of adding more. Can I tell you that honestly after far too many years of filling every single available hour with work, graft and serious trade offs the thought of having free time, stress free quality time to use as I please actually can reduce me to tears. It matters that much. And that is why I will keep committed to the plan. Especially on the hardest days.

You do not have to have huge goals to do the things. What about setting the maintain a happy, healthy and balanced weekly schedule where all your physical needs are met, you can attend to your responsibilties and still feel human at the end of it kind of goal?

Take a minute and think really hard about the one thing, that you can take control of, that would make your life better to the point where you would shed a happy tear or two, or even sit and sob into the cup of coffe that you have probably re-heated 3 times so far #momtroubles

I have never had a client tell me that loosing the last 7lbs would be the game changer that puts them on the path to their dream life. The last 7lbs, or even the first 7 will not matter enough on the rotten awful days where everything sucks and not even the simplest tasks are possible. *Spolier alert…….you dont really care about what you weigh. You care about how you feel.

Your goal has got to hit you in the feels.

Want to feel strong and capable no matter what life throws in your way? Get strong, physically strong. Connect to that feeling and it spills over into every part of your life.

Want to start feeling valued? Start valuing yourself, your time, your boundaries. Make a point of blocking time for you, staying commited to it. Say no if you have to double your work to do the favor or drive 3 times out of your way and dont have time. Let people see you value your time, energy and sanity and they will too.

Feel it, own it and commit to it, whatever it is. The personal goals are the only ones we stick with in the long run, Set yourself up for success and get personal.

If you want a helpful exercise in finding your personal “why” click here to give my favorite client exercise a go.

Happy goal setting x

Start with great intentions

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You might have noticed I didnt kick off January 1st with the whole “New year, new you” nonsense. As much as my profession plays on this old adage, I personally do not buy it.

There is absolutley nothing magical about the turning of a calendar page or chiming of a clock that will suddenly make you better.

I actually believe that the best way to approach this year is calmly, quietly and without and grand promise or declaration that it is your, or anyones year. We have been burned by that too many times this decade already.

If you can relate then keep reading!

This year is about balance, living in a better flow and getting so physically strong that I can carry a weeks food shopping all in one trip. Please dont confuse my start slow approach with a lack of focus or drive, I have that in spades I promise. I just think its time to be less pressured and more measured in work, fitness and everyday.

I have always been an all or nothing kinda girl. Honestly at this stage its probably my biggest weakness. So after 3 years of busting myself in so many ways to keep all the plates spinning I am trying to pratice what I preach.

Heres the truth. Fitness is a lifestyle not a quick fix so the start date has no consequence. Once you are on the path, it is for life so I really think you should be ready. Truly, honestly, I want this for me and no one else ready. Thats when the real results come, and they wont happen as quick as you like. If you start because you should, because you used to be thinner/fitter whatever, you make it conditional.

I have to workout for_____

Well, then its just another box on the to-do list. Another stressor. Another thing that you can fail at or mess up or do badly. Not fun. If you want it to last its got to be more than that.

It also should’nt add hours of inconvience to your week. We all have other things to do and if you go too hard to fit too much at the start you will burn out.

This is about adding a manageable and healthy routine not adding stress. Start with a class/workout/walk and add on. Little by litttle the extra doesnt feel like extra work.

Being strong and fit is actually an addiction in itself so the more you move the more you want to move. Its becomes a part of your life, a habit and non-negotiable. Thats where it gets magic.

The same truth applies any habit you want to change or improve. Small, actionable changes that slowly but surely get you a little closer to the end goal. No hard and fast rules, that I for one would totally look for ways to break, but instead a few really well meant intentions. And a calm and measured plan.

How do you do that? Just pick one thing and commit. Take a class. Change one food habit. Go to bed 15 minutes earlier. The one successful change will inspire you to more success. Just imagine if you achieved one small win every week…..this year really could be, well anything you want really x

New year, better me, one week at a time. Who’s with me?

Follow the blog all this year for my sustainble life and fitness tips, reccomendations and a few glimpses of fun! Podcast relaunching soon x

Creating Momentum

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I want to talk today about the difference between motivation and momentum, because I think we often get a little confused.

So we talked in the previous episode about finding your why, that why is your driving force, it’s your motivation. It’s the thing that is supposed to keep you going even on the very hardest day. But have you ever just not been able to get started?

You have your reason, you have the goal. You know you want it and yet nothing happens. This is where we’ve got to learn to understand the difference between being motivated and creating momentum towards that goal. Motivation is a really funny thing. We talk about it, we throw the word out there and we put up motivational posts in the mornings and they’re supposed to inspire and drive you, but they don’t push you off the chair into that first step. It is super important that you create that for yourself. So this is where we really have to start throwing these excuses out the window and really be accountable for our own actions!!

If like me, you can maybe have a tendency to overthink, perhaps not want to do anything until you’re able to do it just right. Really want to get it perfect. What is perfect?

You can actually create a state of paralysis by continuing to look for that perfect moment. The perfect reason, the perfect habit to create…… massive spoiler alerts….. there is no perfect!

There’s no perfect time. There’s no perfect step. There is no perfect way to do anything, there’s only what you can do right now. And that in the moment is exactly right.

Get out of your own way and don’t stop you from reaching those goals. It is the teeny tiny steps along the way that will actually get you to that end goal. Not a giant leap forward.

Imagine for example, you want to run a marathon. I say imagine because I really can’t imagine that, 26.2 miles. That’s a big scary chunk, and I doubt very much if I kept looking at the 26 mile marker that I’d even want to start with the first step. But what if I simply broke it down a mile at a time, one foot in front of the other? I could actually make a good impact inside of a week, or a month or a year.

If, for example, you have set yourself a goal to lose X amount of weight, that number that big number might seem overwhelming. So why not start with the first pound? Just break it down. Don’t sit there stuck, not being able to celebrate the tiny steps because you’re not as close to the end goal as you would like to be.

Remember, when you started secondary school, high school or college, your end goal was to finish right? If you think back to that time it seemed so far away. But looking back, whether it was four years, seven years, however long you spent studying to finish and tick that box, it’s gone in the blink of an eye. And it’s all the teeny tiny steps, small assignments, the single individual classes. They’re the things that got you to the end.

Yet when it comes to our health and well being, we don’t break it down that way.

Another way that people tend to really create a stagnant state of being is by looking at the negatives. We don’t really achieve well, by focusing on the things we don’t do, the things we can’t do, or the things that we’re not good at. That’s simply going to set you back. What if you focused on the positive? What if I told you that every aspect of a healthy lifestyle was about adding value?

With that in mind, what if instead of taking away all the things we know we’re not supposed to do, we just add in one thing that we are supposed to be doing. One thing that makes us feel better. One thing that gives us more energy. One thing that takes us one step closer to the end goal of our healthiest, happiest self.

I know that that makes it sound super simple, but I promise you, that is the secret!

If you focus on adding in value, adding in healthy habits eventually when you add enough, there won’t be any room left for the bad habits. There won’t be any room left the negative and you will be living your best version of you before you know it. You’re laughing and rolling your eyes and I get that I can hear it from here. (That’s the mommy in me)

But honestly, start today. Start first thing in the morning. Why do you think I released this at 6am just in case you were wondering. It’s to give you that kick in the balls first thing in the morning, when you are at your most motivated. All

you need to do is decide to add one thing that brings you closer to your healthy goal. For example, you want to eat better. Start with one clean, healthy meal made from scratch, in your own kitchen and do it first thing in the morning. You can then tick off that box. Healthy Habits done for today! It’s a little gold star that should keep you going for the rest of your day. Feeling good about making that choice and knowing that you’re on the right track.

Just do it. Nike said it best guys. You can’t argue with that tagline.

Once it’s done, goldstar, box ticked, move on with your day with that satisfaction of knowing you completed your goal. We are all at heart, just giant children. We need to be praised. We need to be told how great we are. And we actually need to learn to do that for ourselves. So create your little tick boxes. Get a chart of gold stars if that’s what it takes. But make sure that every day you add that one health habit until that habit is just part of your norm. Then you can move on to the next one.

Some habits will take a little longer than others. But at the end of the day, it’s not about the speed. It’s about the momentum. Create that momentum for yourself every single day. And the motivation to stay going, will come! They two very different things, but you’re in charge of both. No excuses from now on. Choose your healthy habits, and take a step.

We are here to help and I can’t wait to hear how your first step into a healthy life goes. Have a super week.

Love,

Jess

Is your WHY big enough?

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Last week we talked about why taking the first step is the hardest. And hopefully, you don’t get fired up right. You made all the plans. And you even made a stairs. First day you going great, second day done. But then you got up and it just didn’t go your way. Trust us. You are 100% Normal. You are not bad at making changes, you are not a disaster, and you’re certainly not a failure. You are in fact exactly the same as 99% of the population.

You see all the best plans for the first step into something new, will not carry you through, if your why is not big enough. Today we’re going to get a little personal, I’m going to introduce you to my why and hopefully help you see that with a great reason you can always carry on.

I’m gonna take you back 15 years to a time where things were really bright and breezy for me to be fair. I was just giving birth to my third child, he was six weeks old, I had two boys, a new house and really happy relationship. And then on one very bright sunny afternoon in a split second, everything changed.

My eldest son was knocked down and suffered serious head injuries. And what passed in the couple of years after that was something I wouldn’t wish on anyone and probably the hardest thing I’ve gone through in my life. It was certainly the biggest driver for change in an instant.

So, being that I am a complete control freak…… I admit this readily, all of a sudden, so many things were in control. As a mother, I wasn’t able to help protect or fix one of my children, and life was completely turned upside down.

I actually felt incredibly insignificant, a failure. It was a conversation about three days after the accident, with a very compassionate GP that sparked something in me.

I hadn’t slept between going in and out of Intensive care and minding a six week old baby and I was really struggling to keep it together. My doctor suggested that perhaps I needed some anti anxiety medication, something just to take the edge off which sounds like a perfectly reasonable thing. I wouldn’t judge anyone for it but for me, I just knew that if I couldn’t keep it together right now when they needed me the most, I would never be able to get it back together. So in that moment for me my why became really, really obvious. My why was to be able to be present for my family.

Through everything that’s happened since that is still my reason. Not to say that there aren’t hard days, there always are. But once you find that joy or that thing that’s genuinely good, then, you know that any decision you make that will make you better more capable, or present for whoever or whatever it is that drives you, is always the right decision.

There’s been several more moments in the past 15 years where my why has been tested, and you will always have tests!

I have learned that I’m supposed to reevaluate how I do things, how I turn up, and whether my choices are really serving my family. It’s often in a crisis that we recognize what is most important to us. And if something hurts brings a tear to your eye, or a lump in your throat then you know it really matters.

So when you make that change to take that step into a healthier life, your why has got to be the driving force. If too much of you goes into anyone thing, is it serving that larger purpose?

You’ve got to have something so big and scary, that you’re failing just isn’t an option.

It might be your children, it might be your parents, it could be your partner. If you’re really lucky, it could actually be you. It’s taken me, at least 15 years to take my why, and really be able to turn it in on myself. I have found that I have to be present, happy and healthy to best serve them, so I have become my reason!

It is okay to want to be better. It is, in fact, awesome. You should always be your own why. Take a few minutes and write down the things that are most important to you and don’t apologize for being on that list!

Why the first step is the hardest

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You know the score here ladies and gents, you have decided to make a change! The new diet/fitness class/meditation starts Monday! ( we always pick Monday right?)

Sunday night we are all ready, mentally psyched up, ITS HAPPENING! And then boom…….Monday comes and goes and you have made no change and 101 excuses. Sound familiar?

So reality check….never start on Monday. Choose any other day and psychology says you are more likely to succeed. Outside of that why didn’t we do it? What was the hang up? What was stopping you?

YOU. STOPPED. YOU.Or rather you let fear stop you.

Fear is a funny thing. It is actually highly useful when you are being chased by a tiger, or burning lava or jumping out of a plane( which by the way is amazing and terrifying in equal measure) but why are you afraid of starting a new fitness plan?

Fear of what might happen, fear of failing or just the not knowing can hold you back.

Now you have to decide do you want to give in to it or walk through the fear and change it anyway. My advice is always to jump in!

The first step needs to be small. Something so simple that your brain almost forgets to respond with that fear factor. This way you can just have it done before even you realize. Its like sneaking healthy habits in under your own nose.

For example if you need to drink more water, pop a glass on the nightstand and make a deal with yourself that you will drink it before you turn the alarm off. Simple.

Want to get that home workout in before the kids get up? Lay out the workout gear the night before and put it straight on before you faf about checking your social posts, wiping the counters again or making that second coffee. Adding these tiny first steps chip away at the end goal in an almost seamless fashion and before you know it you are 5 steps closer to that big scary goal! Winner!

Now that is not to say you wont have off days; you are human, it happens. Its remembering to dust them off and move on, back to the baby steps at hand.

You may even need an accountability buddy. Did you know that we are more likely to stick with a plan if we actually say it out loud to someone? A friend, partner, your social media friends, or even more persistently annoying, one of your children. If you tell this person that you are committing to X change and ask them to check in, they will because they are invested in your well being…….sometimes even more than you are.

Which brings me to the most important part of any first step. You need to believe that you are worth the effort. You are a priority, you do deserve to feel your best and you are worth the time it will take to get there. You need to believe this in order to really stay committed.

So whatever first step you need to take to reach that goal, please make sure that along the way you reach a point where you know you deserve the very best results possible x

What will your first step be??

Love, Jess xxx

Are you ok?

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“Are you ok?”
 
 
How many times do we ask and answer this question?
Is the answer we give ever the whole truth? I am going to hazard a guess that the answer to that is no.
I mean of course it is 100% acceptable to just reply to the Steve on the checkout with a standard, yeah all good answer (the poor guy does not want or need the details of the argument you had with the other half before leaving this morning, the pressures of your totally unfair work load or to know how little sleep you got last night because of the kids)
However when the question comes from your significant other, a friend or family member, who does it serve to just give the standard reply? Or is it that you haven’t really examined the truth for yourself……..
 
I spent years convincing myself that I was ok, just so that I could give the “yeah all is good” answer and not feel guilty about it. But eventually, you have to be able to be honest and say that maybe I am not alright with me.
That is not to say that I thought I was a bad person, bad mother (some days!) or even that I was failing in any particular aspect of life. I just wasn’t really being the person I wanted to be. I was too caught up in rushing to the next meeting or pick up, chasing the next target or promotion, keeping things running smoothly at the expense of my own feelings. I spent years literally taking myself for granted in a way that I would not dream of doing to someone I love! Sound familiar?
 
For so many people right now, in the midst of social distancing, you are possibly coming to terms with that fact that you are not actually ok. Physically you are healthy maybe even what you consider to be fit. Hopefully you have a network of people who are there to support you, family and friends and co-workers who are touching base. A roof over your head and food on the table and access to entertainment and communications, all of which make us blessed in so many ways, and even with all of that, you do not feel good with you.
 
The real truth is;
“I have no home but me.” Anne Truit

If that is the case, and you are not at home in yourself, how could you be alright?
What can you do to make amends with yourself? How can you make you better?
 
Start by admitting to the oversights, the harsh thoughts and the down right neglect you have put yourself through! You do not need to always come last, not even where the kids are concerned! You will be a better parent if you have the things you need.
Think about or write down any negative thought you have had about yourself in the last 3 days………Shocking stuff once you start, I mean I really would not be friends with me on my worst days! Can you imagine saying those things to a friend, sister, daughter? Nope.
Turn those statements around and instead of berating yourself for your perceived short comings, simply add them to a mental or physical “I can improve on”…….list
I have a daily “I can improve by being more patient” dialogue going, but I know I am getting better at waiting for it to actually happen(lol)
 
Really ask yourself what you could do today to make you feel better, feel more at home in your head or in your own skin. Some days the answer is nothing, as in I need to sit still and do nothing, and that is a totally acceptable answer. You might find the little things you have denied yourself for the sake of weight loss, healthy eating, beauty might provide you a little glimmer of happiness and make you feel a little better than do it. Life is too short to never eat the cake.
Most importantly come to terms with not being 100% ok all the time, and remember that the honest answer is normally the best one, unless its Steve at the checkout!
 
What will you do today to be a better friend to yourself?
Let me know x

No time like the present!

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Whoa.

So I guess we really didn’t see that coming did we?

Real life feels like the unexpected plot twist in a crazy sci-fi end of the world movie……

(side note, who gets to play you in the on screen version? Answers in the comments!)

Stuck/safe in our homes,depending on your perspective, and forced to attempt to keep some kind of routine in a seemingly never ending cycle of bad news and ever extending end dates. Not the #2020 I signed up for.

You have a choice to make;

  1. Spend indefinite time period in pjs, lounging aimlessly, snacking mindlessly and indulging in occasional/constant wallowing in self pity
  2. Use some of this imposed down time to get shit done!

No judgement here, I will throw my hands up straight away and tell you that my #lockdown will most definitely be a combination of both of these fine choices, but I know that when this is all over, and it will be one day, I would 100% hate myself for wasting time that was literally gift wrapped and forced into my hands.

Ok hear me out…….

I recently, in an effort to make better use of my time did an exercise in time wasters, and found that yeah social media needed a little cull, but 14 hours of my week were actually spent on running to and fro with school pick ups, drop offs, extra curricular activities, and the general hanging around waiting mum stuff. 14 hours……that is almost 2 working days!

So I could get annoyed at the fact that my kids and I are all stuck at home, all trying to use the wi-fi (yes we actually had to put a rota in place) and struggling to not drive each other nuts, or I can genuinely celebrate the fact fact that the universe decided to hand me 14 hours of my precious time back.

I am going to use it. For me. For things that I have wanted/needed to do for ages and for the occasional Nexflix binge.

Look around and see what half finished projects you would love to pick up. Check out recipes online or in the cookbooks that have been too often over looked in the hustle. Have a search for online courses, webinars, challenges and try new things.

Despite being stuck/safe at home the world is still very literally at your fingertips. You just have to choose xx

We are sharing some of our favourite free courses, webinars and our own #lockdown challenge over on Instagram! Check out @fitttrain to see whats out there